ADHD and beyond!

Thank you for coming to this part of my website. It’s not for everyone. I find it interesting and helpful to learn about other people’s ‘journeys’ with mental health and navigating their neurodivergence and trauma. So I thought I would share mine in the hope that it might be interesting and helpful to someone else. It might just be for me though, and that’s ok too!

I decided to get a diagnosis because I have been told for years, by so many people, that I am ADHD. I’m energetic and restless, I seem to be juggling multiple balls at any given time, I have so many alarms and lists in order to keep on track, I have anxiety and have experienced bouts of depression and chronic insomnia, I forget belongings when I go places, I am tangential when I tell stories… To name a few of the reasons people said it!

My youngest offspring was diagnosed as autistic and ADHD in primary school. I wouldn’t be shocked if my eldest is also somewhere on either of those spectrums. I think sometimes we recognise the struggles our kids have and start wondering about ourselves. When I was writing Disgraceful I dug out an old school report. Several teachers suggested that I could do better if I would just apply myself, that I wasn’t reaching my full potential, or that I seemed to struggle to focus at times.

I thought confirming I have ADHD and learning more about it and how it has impacted me might be helpful. I wasn’t seeking medication. Someone asked me why I wanted the diagnosis if I didn’t want the meds and I said that I want to be a better person. I want to be the best version of me I can be. I also felt like I needed it to be confirmed before I could rightfully claim it. I guess there was a bit of me – the internal negative voice – that said I shouldn’t claim it without being able to prove it. I’m not worthy of saying I am something, unless someone else has confirmed it. I seek validation from others!

Diagnostic process

  • In August 2025 I spoke to my GP and got a referral to a psychiatrist
  • I went through an online clinic that a friend had gone through
  • It took about ten days for me to complete the online forms, upload some relevant documentation (old school reports), and get someone close to me (a friend who has known me for over 30 years) to complete a form too
  • I was told that the documents would be reviewed and I’d be notified if anything else was needed
  • After a few weeks I followed up and it turned out that I was supposed to log back in and pay something before I could make the appointment. I’m sure I’m not the first person awaiting an ADHD assessment to have skipped a step and lost track of the process!
  • Once I paid the $1075 fee I was notified that I could make an appointment online, which I did
  • My appointment was for late October
  • The GP had to complete some paperwork confirming that they were happy to provide support and prescribe ADHD medication
  • They would then need to apply for a license after diagnosis
  • I made an appointment with my GP for a couple of weeks after the appointment, so we could discuss the report once the GP had it
  • I had an online telehealth appointment, where we talked about some of my history, my background, my challenges, my triggers
  • At the appointment the psychiatrist confirmed that I have ADHD
  • I was also diagnosed with CPTSD – Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. This was a bit of a surprise and I’ll go into that later
  • I got $444.90 back as a medicare rebate
  • My GP had to apply for the special license, which took just under 3 weeks
  • I then made another appointment with my GP to discuss diagnoses and medication. I decided – based on the things I was learning – that it might be worth giving the meds a go
  • I got my meds on 12th December 2025. 4 months after getting the referral from my GP

Two for the price of one!

Obviously I was seeking and expecting the ADHD diagnosis. The CPTSD was a bit of a surprise.

I guess I had kind of hoped the ADHD diagnosis would explain everything – my challenges, my quirks, my anxiety which has been present since childhood… I thought being ADHD might be a straightforward, singular, explanation for all of it!

The diagnostic process was quite clinical. Questions were asked that brought up traumatic memories, but there was no care or support around those memories. Interestingly the psychiatrist told me that they had seen several other people before me that day and concluded that those people all had CPTSD and not ADHD. The psychiatrist said that I was very clearly both.

So, the additional diagnosis has meant a bit of ‘unpacking’ (of emotional baggage): How much has ADHD impacted trauma and vice versa? How can I learn from these diagnoses, to be better, more grounded, and happier? How can I understand my complex needs in order to meet them?

A couple of people suggested I might come away with an Autism diagnosis as well as ADHD. I wasn’t being assessed for that, so I can’t categorically say I don’t have autism, but I think the CPTSD might explain some of the behaviours that could have led people to suggest that.

Non-Pharmaceutical treatments

After getting the diagnosis a lovely colleague and friend reminded me that through work we have free counselling through an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) and there is a specialist neurodivergence stream. I booked an apppointment. Then I had to reschedule (again, surely this is normal for someone with ADHD!).

I had a session soon after the diagnosis. I flagged that I have done a lot of talking therapy in the past and I don’t necessarily want to revisit my traumas (although some I had buried came up when I was diagnosed). I wanted to move forward, not dwell in the past.
The counsellor was great – an ADHD and CPTSD person himself and someone who writes books about it! He gave me some practical tools to help regulate myself:

  • Breathing – 5 breaths in and out, 5 times a day. Pause after exhalation. A rough guide to this: Morning, morning tea, lunchtime, afternoon tea, dinner
  • Find things that ground me e.g. stroking my pets, getting a hug
  • Exercise! Something I haven’t really done formally for over a year 🙁
  • Meditate
  • Work on my intrinsic sense of self and affirm myself
  • Keep a journal in which I record pictures or words describing three positive things – about myself, memories, experiences, things I like, so that I can refer to it and remind myself
  • Try to recognise when I’m getting heightened and take time out. Maybe let work know, so that if I need to take myself off to self-regulate they’ll understand.

The counsellor also suggested some further reading and learning:

It was really helpful and less isolating. I got the workbook and started doing it and then got a bit overwhelmed by some of the stuff that was coming up.

I had another session with the counsellor today (4th Feb 2026). I’ll go back to the workbook.
I’m also going to try expressive journaling. This will look like – picking one trauma to work through at a time – write a stream of consciousness for 10 minutes a day about that trauma. After 10 mins destroy it and do something nice for myself. If I get an extreme reaction – crying, angry etc, I can stop before the 10mins is up. Then destroy it. Don’t re-read it. Don’t edit it. Just write and then burn (literally or metaphorically!).
The idea is that I will start to train my brain to look at the past trauma and not get triggered. If feelings about the trauma come up outside of the writing time I can acknowledge the thought and put it aside, to be looked at when I write the next day. The counsellor reccommended 10 days of this. After 5 days of catharsis I should feel a shift. I can then move more calmly through the writing and after 10 days I can close that chapter. We’ll see how that goes!

We also discussed the overwhelm that I (and I guess a lot of people with ADHD and/or trauma) get and the need to break things down. We talked about ‘the monster’ and how it’s not really one big monster but lots of little monsters. Breaking it down – whacking the smaller moles and trying not to be overwhelmed thinking it’s one big monster! The counsellor said “Not acknowledging all the small things/triggers/memories/stressors means they gang up on you”. That made sense to me.

I’ll go back to the workbook too, but utilise grounding tools if that becomes triggering.

Pharmaceutical treatments

I was a bit hesitant to try ADHD meds. I have lived with this for over 50 years (what? no way! etc) and feel I have various systems and processes – lists, alarms, calendars etc, to help me manage. I am able to complete tasks (albeit with a few side quests often in the mix). However speaking to the counsellor, my GP, friends who have found medication helpful, and a relative who is a psychiastrist and believes ADHD meds do work, I decided to give them a go!
I’ve also been on an anti-depressant (Axit: Mertazapine) for almost 10 years, which was life changing in a good way. So I’m aware that medication can help. I was also curious as to how ADHD meds might impact my anxiety and depression and whether I could consider coming off the antidepressant.

I was prescribed Vyvanse: Lisdexamfetamine dimesilate 30mg, which is a slow release stimulant, along with Aspen Dexamfetamine 5mg, which is a fast acting stimulant.

This morning I decided to try to Aspen Dexamfetamine, to see how it affected me. I didn’t want to try to slow release in case I didn’t like how it felt and wanted it out of my system asap. So far… I can’t really even say so good! Just yeah. I feel fine. At one point I observed my heart was racing a bit. I reminded myself this was the meds and not anxiety. I didn’t have a big chunky work thing to tackle, I just had a list of things to do. I’ve been getting through it. One of them was to write this! So now I know there’s no adverse impact I will try the Vyvanse at work and see if it helps me stay focussed and calm.

Is this helpful?

I’ll keep adding to this. If you want to know when I post updates feel free to let me know.

If you’re on a similar journey – no matter how far along you are – I’d love to hear from you too!